Small town girl 

Have you made the move from a small town to a big city? What are the biggest changes you’ve noticed? SUPPLIED
1. The mere thought of a highly congested road or a multi-lane intersection is enough to send you into a full-blown state of automobile anxiety.

2. Whenever you meet someone new in a bar or club and they’re not your first cousin or a best friend’s ex-boyfriend you get immensely excited. Fresh genes!

3. You grew up eating broccoli not broccolini.

4. You’re cynical about people on random street corners handing you out promotional gifts for free. What is this mysterious concept of ‘marketing’ people are so invested in, and is this cereal box really for free or will I have to sell you my soul for it first?

5. Public transport to you is a giant vortex of people. Deciphering how to get from A to B alone can be compared to solving the Di Vinci code.

6. You still get amazed by the amount of buskers performing on the streets. The very notion that they can make an entire living from this confuses you all the more.

7. You have an unhealthy reliance on caffeine and have conformed to drinking barista-made coffees only. You’re now one of the people you used to mock for blowing $30 a week on coffee.

8. When people ask you where your hometown is, they can almost never place it.

They will however insist on naming every single town or attraction within a five-mile radius of it. Each one virtually nowhere near where you’re actually from. I tend to just play along with this one now.

9. You spend more money on eating out and drinking at bars now than you ever paid in rent.

10. You still find elevator etiquette somewhat eerie and awkward. Thou shall not make eye contact with anyone else in the lift cell.

11. Your social calendar is nearly always full, but when holidays approach you’re oddly alone. You either fend off the loneliness yourself or gatecrash another family’s function.

12. No matter how pushed for time you are, you never succumb to push and shove tactics to propel people out of your way.

13. Your diet now consists of mainly Korean, Japanese or Mexican food and you can’t remember the last time you had just a roast or beef casserole.

14. It’s been months since you last smelled the ocean or walked through a muddy paddock. Now you spend 23 hours a day within an air-conditioned dome.

15. If your destination doesn’t have wifi, it’s a deal breaker.

16. You now know that the biggest drawback of city living is that when it rains you can never walk along the pavement with an umbrella. Two hundred people next to you might have the same idea.

17. You’d never witnessed an argument between complete strangers over escalator positioning before. There is an unwritten code to escalators people, keep left or feel the wrath of an uprising.

18. If someone lives on the opposite side of the city to you, you can’t be friends. Or at least not have anything else you need to get done that day should you decide to commute out to them. Best take a packed lunch and an exceptionally long book.

19. You used to be home in 10 minutes, now it takes you 50.

20. Whenever you enter a highrise building with a stunning vista you’re instantly transfixed, and proceed to stare out of the window like a cat caught in a daydream.

From that moment on, every single encounter you have includes a customary comment about the view and its grandeur. Most definitely uncool.

Found this at Stuff

Love From Tess xo


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